You feel you were born the wrong gender and you are worried that something bad might happen if you reveal your feelings to those around you.
Admitting something like this, even to those closest to you or to someone you are almost sure will be supportive, is extremely frightening. It’s normal that you are experiencing anxiety.
When you tell someone you trust about your feelings, it will help you to explore your gender issues. Having someone you can confide in and who can give you advice will allow you to feel less alone and less worried about the reactions of those who might not support you. It might also be helpful if you found a therapist to discuss these things with.
Trying to repress your feelings can be very damaging over time. Being honest with those around you and allowing yourself to discover the different possibilities that exist for coping with gender issues is a healthy choice.
Transitioning or presenting in a gender non-conforming way can be stressful in secondary school. However, university can be a much more open-minded place. If you are still in secondary school, you may find that you no longer feel so much worry about bullies once you have moved on to university (or other pursuits).
It’s true that being transgendered can be difficult. There are many obstacles that you may have to face. However, you will increase your chances of being successful against these obstacles if you have help from those around you and if you are being honest with yourself and others.