Dear Lexi,

Thank you for writing in about your concerns about your adolescent — You brought up issues regarding your child’s gender identity (ie that she is identifying as female and was born male), and around her sexual orientation (that she identitifies as gay). You also mentioned being concerned about your child’s safety from ‘gay bashers’ .

You are not alone in struggling with your feelings concerning your child’s gender identity, sexual orientation, and safety. In fact, a group called PFLAG, which has been around for a long time, formed to provide a supportive space for parents and friends of gay, lesbian and transgender people to talk about their feelings and strategies at how best to be ally to their loved one.

To find your local PFLAGT (Parents, Families, and Friends of Lesbians and Gays and Transgenders) go to the following website:

www.pflag.org

There is also a book that has come highly recommended that you might find helpful to read. It is called ‘Trans Forming Families’ by Mary Boenke. A brief description of the book and how to order it can be found on the following website:

http://aiyiyi.com/transbook/

I have also been told that Mary Boenke will respond to questions via email. She can be reached by contacting

MaryBoenke@AOL.com

As a final word, I would just like to mention that there is no one ‘gay lifestyle’. Gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people have a very wide ranging and divergent way of being in the world. There is no one ‘gay’ way of life.

Best regards,

Andrea

Alterhéros