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I often think about my friend, am I bisexual ?
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I often think about my friend, am I bisexual ?

Question asked by Cerena (20 years old questioning woman from Tanzania, Tanzania)

Question answered on May 25, 2006 by

Sorted in Acceptance, Bisexuality, Questions

I have never had a sexual experience with a female, i have with a male but i was very young and not ready.
I have been attracted to other females and often had fantasies about being with one sexually.
over the past years, i have found myself in situations where i grew crushes on my closest friends.
In college,i would hang with the guys alot and have very few girlfriends because i felt more comfortable being around the guys.
I recently found out my best friend from college who was also a guys girl and who i used to hang out with alot and spend most of my time with(just the two of us) is actually bisexual,she did not tell me i read it on her profile. ever since i cannot seem to stop thinking about her,and i have developed a crush on her.
we used to touch and hugg alot without even being aware of it,and one day we were cuddling on the sofa holding hands while watching a movie.(with other ppl around) and they would call us lezboz as a joke.
am i bisexual?

Dear Cerena,

Thanks for writing to Alterheros. It sounds like you are in the process of coming to some understanding as to what sexual orientation fits for you. A short answer to your question ‘Am I bisexual?’ is that only you can know the answer to that. It may take time to figure it all out. One thing to remember though, is that having a sexual experience with someone of the same or opposite sex doesn’t necessarily make you bisexual or straight or homosexual. It is the meaning you make of those experiences that will help you determine what your sexual orientation is. It is also important to remember that each sexual orientation, be it lesbian, bisexual or straight, is equally valid. One is not better than the other.

Your fantasies can be a good point to start : you say your have some about women… do you have about men ? Do you see yourself in a relationship with a girl ? With a guy ? How would be your perfect life ?? These are some questions that you can’t start with… but don’t forget you’re never oblige to define or to label yourself…

I hope this is helpful, and please write back again should you have more questions.

Andrea

Alterheros

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