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Should I ask her if she’s bisexual?
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Should I ask her if she’s bisexual?

Question asked by Kyla (14 years old woman from Philippines, Philippines)

Question answered on August 21, 2010 by

Sorted in Extracurricular activities, Bisexuality, Questions

I’m a girl and I think this girl I’ve only known for three months likes me. I have classes with her and I would often see her staring at me and if I look back at her, she would break the contact and I think she only does this because she’s shy.

Sometimes, she would walk around me dreamily and I don’t know if she really does this with her other friends. Then, just recently, I was sitting on my desk and she walked up to me and she suddenly held my hand and I thought she was finally gonna tell me that she likes me but she didn’t. Apparently, she was showing a friend her technique on arm wrestling.

What confused me more was why was it me that she had do that arm wrestling technique with when she had friends sitting near her desk. I admit liking the touch of her hand.

I don’t know if she’s bisexual too, like me, because her crushes are mainly guys (celebrity guys). What should I do? Should I ask her?

Hi Kyla,

It is tough to figure out what other people are thinking. It can be even harder to interpret their actions.

You mentioned that you are bisexual. Do your friends know this? This girl might be nervous or curious. Being a teenager is a tough time. Perhaps this girl thinks you are interesting and wants to get to know you better. She might want to be friends with you, or just get to know you better.

Asking her if she is bisexual might make her feel awkward or defensive. Try talking to your friends about the situation, maybe you have some mutual friends that can give you a better idea. They might have noticed something that you did not.

Just acting like you normally do would probably be the best thing to do. See if she talks to you or approaches you. This way there is no awkwardness and both of you can be as comfortable as possible when you do interact. That is one of the most important things.

Suzanne at AlterHeros

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Suzanne holds a bachelor of Arts in Anthropology from Arizona State University in 2001 with a Minor in Religious Studies. She also completed another Bachelor of Arts in Psychology from Thompson Rivers University in 2010. Suzanne also participated in two workshops through La Clé des champs, a community-based mental health support organization for people suffering from anxiety disorders.

I am interested in being a part of Tell the Experts because I like the thought of being able to help people in some way. I know the struggles I went through and an organization such as this would have been wonderful to have had available.

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